Diane the "Activist"

Q: Are you active in the trans community or LGBT community?

OK, I've just experienced my first block.  I'm powering through!

This is a hard one for me because I have a very nebulous idea of what "active in the community" means. Does this refer to how I fit in, or how much time I spend in my life talking to members of the community, how hard I'm working for the community or what working for the community might entail, or some combination of those things plus some other intangible.  Maybe the measure of what "active in the community" is comes down to the amount of gratitude one feels and how one uses that gratitude in one's life.

I am in the transgender and TLBG community, like it or not. I can't help but be. I love trans people. I have many trans and queer friends. I get excited every time I meet someone new who is also part of my community. I want to see us all become happy and live productive, creative, connected and happy lives.  

Am I being asked to quantify what I give back? Probably I don't give back enough, but I do contribute. It's worth noting that all of us contribute by being visible and living our authentic lives. Visibility is crucial. It brings with it two statements. It says "This is what it means to be trans*" and it also provides an example for those who come after us. "Yes, you can live a happy and fulfilled life. If you are feeling the need to change your alignment in regards to gender in the world, if you've been told you're one gender but have never felt like what they tell you about yourself is the truth, you have my example to consider. Happiness is not at all impossible."

Along those lines, I feel a lot of gratitude towards so many who came before me:  Bethany, Gina, Ariana, Maggie, Janet, Jenny, Laverne, Namoli, Brenda, Meghan, Jerica, Erin, Renée, and Paris are just a few of the ladies who have shown me that what might be possible.  Thank you for being my examples.  I know that your lives have not been without struggle, but I see that you have come through and gotten to a better place.  You have all shown me that I could be happy.  Thank you.

Liturgy For the Day After They Announced the End of the World

It's beautiful.
It's not ours.

Your stupid smart phone
Times a billion
Is destroying us.

Your dirty car
Times a billion
Is destroying us.

Your damned lies
Times a billion
Are destroying us.

It's beautiful.
Can't you see?

The sun, golden!
The river, dancing!
The trees, like shamans!
     Waving!
     Embracing!
     Staying!
     Swaying!

Us.
We're beautiful
We don't even see it.

The air.
You can't see it.
Still, it's beautiful.

Dance in it.
Glow in it.
Love it.
Embrace it.

God damn it,
Save us.
Love us.
Love me.
I love you.

Accept this gift.
Give it back.
Give it forward.

It's beautiful.

Bricks

Note: This was written yesterday.

The bricks you amble down
Take the message of your shoes
Facing up but carrying
The passage that you're making
A short distance now
But continued and continuing.

If your mantle ever
Billows out around you
As you saunter from here
To there, and in the shadows
Beneath that cloak I see
A little bit of secret truth

Of course I will wonder
As I tread different bricks
On my own walk.

I see that your bricks
Are like the ones beneath me
And my own black mantle
Billows, though I try to hold it closed,
Casts light into my own shadows.

I both worry
And hope
That you might see.

Going Out on a Limb Here...

Nobody thrives on abuse
It doesn't make you stronger
Dishing it out is not power
Taking it is not strength

I've made that mistake
Learned that thinking too well
That costs too much
And it keeps costing.

The Buddha sat under a baobab.

What is power to a tree?
The power of a tree, I think, is
     to take in light and
     to make nourishment for itself.

What is strength for a tree?
The strength of a tree is
     to give shade,
     to grow tall and spread out its limbs,
     to give small things a home, and
     to grow fruit.

Channel 5 Said

They must silence.
They must fashion
For themselves
A life of small things.

When they are not special
When nobody could have been
Then without our eyes
They must move on.

Then, you know,
Then we asked ourselves
As they showed themselves
What it is for us:

A time for many
As one of many
When all of us
Can praise each other.

Cost

48,000 American dead and wounded, 650,000 dead in Iraq, uncounted more the world over, all to supposedly get 1 guy who is *allegedly* responsible for 3,000 deaths. Remember that proof of Osama bin Laden's responsibility for those attacks was promised, but has never been provided.

Vlog for 2/26/11 my paper on lgbt & antebellum slavery

What's inside

There's a point about halfway through this poem where I just lift off the ground and hover in the air for about 30 seconds.

Who could look at a kid this age and think that such language could come out of his mouth? He didn't write it, and may not understand it fully, but it speaks to him strongly enough that he can say it and mean something by it. I hope what you get out of this is what I get out of it: The human spirit contains much that can't be explained by outward appearances.